Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Moving to Massachusetts.

So. I'm moving to Massachusetts.  I'm not sure when, though. That depends on the US government.  We have hired an immigration lawyer to help us, and once our paperwork is in order, I will file an application for a fiancee visa, and I will go to the US consulate in Ottawa for an interview.  It is at this point that  I hope to convince the powers-that-be that I am marrying Brian for love, his rugged good looks and his comic book collection, and  NOT to sneak into the country.

 It has occurred to me that if I wanted to just sneak into the country, I live so close to the Canada/US border, I could just cut through the bush. Or head over to Malone "for groceries".  I know that, and you know that. Still, wisdom tells me that I probably shouldn't assume that my interviewers will know that. Or will want to hear about it.

The interview should be interesting.  I probably should wear a muzzle.

If I sound flippant about this, I am not.  This process is not going to be easy, and the acquisition of permission to marry my American hunny is not going to be the hard part.  From the time that Brian proposed in November to just recently, whenever I though about marrying  Brian, my inner narrative went something like this, "I am going to marry him, I am going to be with him, I am going to Massachusetts!"

Now, though, all I can think about is that I am leaving home.

Going...yay!

Leaving...oh.

There is a process happening inside of me. A letting go, so that I can openly and freely receive what God is bringing into my life.  The letting go is beginning to hurt. And it hasn't even begun.

I think that this is something that I need to blog about.  A series, maybe.  Can I commit to being honest about this process, though?  What if it gets messy? Oh, who am I kidding, it will get messy.  Will I be able to be true to the mess? To myself? To God?  And more importantly, dare I not be true?

I don't know.  If a journey of a thousand steps begins with one, then step one is coming up with a name for this new adventure in writing.  I don't know if I have the courage to write a blog series on leaving Canada to move to the States, but maybe all I need to be able to do now is find a title for the series.

Any suggestions?









2 comments:

Anonymous said...

"1 step further" "one step closer" "one step away from home to home" "Taking that first step" (I like the last one) Kay so we have to have a tea date ASAP if you are leaving AND I want to visit you one day when you live in the states, promise ?

My advice to you is to start telling yourself this is no longer home, when my parents kicked me out of my 4 year home I was so angry and devastated - but i all channeled that into anger- though not recommended because I ended up failing and dropping out of school.
Home is where your hearts at and from what i can see it is with brain, and that is where you should be.
Love you Kelly ! xoxo Amber <3

Kelly said...

Thanks so much, Amber. I know how angry and hurt you were when you had to leave your home. I have been praying that you would find a place that feels like home. I know it's hard. Although from your blog post about your new job, I'm thinking your new home may involve cows? :) You are so awesome with animals, and I am glad that you are enjoying them. Poop and all.

I love you too, sweetie. We need to have tea, and when I finally do move, we can always Skype too. I'm telling you, I am going to be their poster girl! xxxooo

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