My 2012 Gratitude List, part 4

2. I am grateful for the lessons in letting go that God has been sharing with me.  I wrote this in a blog post in June - "There is no magic in the letting go.  The freedom comes in knowing that by letting go, my concerns are then able to be picked up and cared for by One who is faithful and trustworthy, who loves me and those I love, who carries my treasures with the utmost wisdom and care. 

I don't always get the results that I want.  Still, I have a feeling that someday, somewhere, I will look back on this life and my walk through it, and I will see that I have received what I needed. "  

The freedom to let go is a gift of grace and mercy, and I am so thankful for it. It is a daily lesson for me, and I need continual reminders.  Part of the difficulty is learning  how to let things, issues or people go without throwing them away.  I am learning to continue to pray, to care, to love even as I let go, release and live freely.  I can love someone without needing them to be or do what I want them to.  I can let go of a problem while still doing what is needed to solve the problem.  There are things that are within my control, and things that aren't.  I can set appropriate boundaries, share my feelings openly, speak the truth and make my needs and expectations known, but I cannot make anyone listen, or care, or honor what I give them.

Letting go of that desire to make others respond to me in a way that pleases me leaves me free to love them, and to love them as I walk away, if that is what they wish or what is needed.  Similarly, I can do the things I know to do in response to any problem, but I cannot always control the outcome.  That belongs to God.  So I can trust Him, do my part and let the rest go.  I cannot describe the freedom that comes with this.

and...drum roll please...

1. The One who receives all of my gratitude for 2012 is God.  Oh, come now.  You were expecting that, weren't you?   God is the common denominator in all other things to be grateful for.  He is the Source of all good things in my life, the Root of all growth and change, the Light that guides my every step when I follow Him closely, the Love that flows to me, and through me, the Hope that each day will be filled with Him and therefore, good.  He has been my provider in ways that have left me in awe.

 Just recently I had a disconcerting moment, when I remembered that I was going to have to pay for Grace's Cegep registration this week. I had been so focused on buying the books, I completely forgot about the registration.  I didn't have the money, and had no idea how I was going to pay it. Immediately and out-loud, I said, "God, this one is Yours."  I gave the problem to Him.  I let it go. The anxiety dissipated, and I was at peace.  Just a few moments before this, my pastor had handed me a late Christmas card from someone in her other church. I had tucked in my purse to open later.  It was from someone that I have just been getting to know over the past year, an older woman who attends a Bible study that I also attend.

Later, when I  opened the card, a cheque fell out.  It was for twice what I needed.  I laughed out-loud.  Even before I was aware of the need, God had seen to it.  Not only had He met the need through this wonderful woman of God, but He gave more, so that purchasing Grace's school books wouldn't be such a difficulty.

I called my friend and told her what a tremendous blessing her gift had been.  It was important to me that she understand that the gift was more than just the money.  My friend had allowed God to show me, through her, that He really, really, really was talking care of me, anticipating my needs even before I was aware of them and meeting them, purely out of love for me.  He knows my heart.  He knows how much I want to trust Him, and He honors that desire within His children.  The most important thing that God wants to give me is Himself.  He is the gift.  I know I have said it before, but as long as I live, I will never get over the wonder and joy of being loved by the God of creation, the Lord of the Universe, the Master of all that is.  Any strength I have lies in this truth.  Every bit of life that is in me, is rooted in God's love.  Every hope that I have for the future lies in Him.

And for that, I am utterly, astoundingly, wonderfully, thrillingly grateful

Peace out.

Following Jesus - The Good Samaritan and Mercy

On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. "Teacher," he asked, "what must I do to inherit eternal life?"

"What is written in the Law?" he replied. "How do you read it?"

He answered: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'"

"You have answered correctly," Jesus replied. "Do this and you will live."
But he wanted to justify himself, so he asked Jesus, "And who is my neighbor?"

In reply Jesus said: "A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he fell into the hands of robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, took him to an inn and took care of him. The next day he took out two silver coins and gave them to the innkeeper. 'Look after him,' he said, 'and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.'

"Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?"

The expert in the law replied, "The one who had mercy on him."
Jesus told him, "Go and do likewise" Luke 10:25 - 37


Who was the neighbor? The one who showed mercy. It's hard not to notice that the expert in the law didn't actually choke out the words, "The Samaritan". Baby steps. He did know the answer, though.

Mercy is an interesting word. It means kindness, compassion, but with a twist. Mercy is kindness and compassion, undeserved. Kindness and compassion, in spite of. Kindness and compassion, when anger and vengeance might be expected. Mercy is being kind and compassionate to one who in no way deserves our kindness and compassion, either because we have no relational obligation to them, or because they have sinned against us. In fact, mercy is not giving someone the punishment that they do deserve. Interesting.

When my daughter was small, I read in a Christian parenting magazine that, in order to teach her what mercy meant, I should occasionally not discipline her when she deserved it. Of course there were prerequisites. She needed to be sorry for what she had done, she needed to know what the consequences were and she needed to understand why I was not implementing the consequences. I talked about the concept of mercy with her over the course of the next couple of weeks. One day we were in a grocery store, and I had made the rare overture of offering her a treat at the end of the shopping if she behaved herself during the shopping. She didn't behave herself. By the time I was finished filling my cart, I was tired, frustrated and had spoken to her several times about her whining and begging for me to buy things. As we waited our turn in the checkout lane, it occurred to me that it would be a good time for a lesson in mercy. So I turned to her and asked her what she wanted for a treat. Her eyes lit up and she immediately began to scan the goody rack in front of us. Then she stopped. She looked up at me. She grinned, and said, "Hey...you're giving me mercy, aren't you?" She threw her arms around me, looked up into my eyes and thanked me. Then she apologized for her behavior earlier. She picked out her treat, and in the car on the way home we had a really neat talk about mercy, how good it feels to receive it and how it makes one want to be merciful to others.

It was more than a good teaching moment. Grace and I have had repeated opportunities to show mercy to each other. I often benefit from the fact that she is a deeply compassionate, merciful young woman. She did not become this way because of me. She became this way by her own desire to be merciful and by her relationship with a God whose very Presence in her life is a supreme act of mercy.

Being merciful is definitive proof that we love someone unconditionally. Even when consequences must be implemented, mercy remains kind and compassionate. I have disciplined Grace many times since that moment at the grocery store. Sometimes mercy is removing the consequences, but to be honest, consequences can be an expression of mercy. Consequences teach the connection between deeds and outcomes of deeds. Lessons are learned this way. It does us no good to always be protected from the consequences of our actions, and God does not often do this for us. I will say, though, that God has protected me from the full force of the consequences of my actions. The wages of sin are death. Through Christ, I am set free from the death that awaits my sin. By His sacrifice, I am made clean. Compared to that, the consequences I might face here on earth are manageable. But mercy also shows itself in compassion while consequences are being suffered. For the merciful, the words "I told you so" must die before they ever reach our tongues.

Parents and spouses can be especially prone to this. We see the mistakes. We can predict the outcomes. We may even have "told them so". When the hammer falls, it can be hard to muster up some compassion. Self-righteousness comes so much easier. When someone is suffering the consequences of their actions, and shares their suffering with us, often the best thing to do is keep quiet. Words are not required. It is usually a time to listen, to understand, to share the pain. Even if the person cannot see the connection between their present pain and their past actions, mercy and compassionate love in the midst of the pain will go a long way to opening their ears and hearts to anything we might have to say later. The point to remember is that it is not about you. It is not about what you knew would happen or what you think should be done now. Mercy says, "You, first." If need be, "You, second, third and fourth" as well. Love your neighbor as yourself.

The entire parable of the Good Samaritan is about mercy. Love. People. We've been here a long time, looked at it from many different angles. When a scripture passage begins with someone asking Jesus how to inherit eternal life, and ends with Jesus saying, "Go and do likewise", I think that makes it an important place to linger. It seems like Jesus is asking a lot in this passage. It seems like the bar is placed pretty high. And it is. This is not a comfortable passage. Living it out will not be comfortable. One of the things I often get from Jesus' teachings is that comfort is not a big priority to Him. Good thing, too. He was facing the cross, after all. I do think, though, that following Jesus brings more than comfort. It brings peace. It brings joy. And it brings a love that is passionate, relentless, unconditional, unstoppable, unbelievable.

Next, I think I will be writing about the parable of The Unmerciful Servant. If our desire is to be a disciple of Jesus, it is vital that we understand His heart for us, and for those around us. Discipleship begins in the heart. It begins for a reason. As we say good-bye to the Good Samaritan, we may be daunted by the sheer boundlessness of love that Jesus is asking us to give. As we will see from the unmerciful servant, there is a reason why Jesus expects so much from us. And there are consequences for turning from His path.

Until tomorrow, stay merciful.